Apparently The Hologram is going back and forth with Cam Cam and Uncle Jessie. My advice is to listen to those tracks at your own risk. The only thing wacker than thinking about this “beef” is talking about it, or even worse, listening to the tracks and forming an opinion on the whole situation. Let’s just hope Danny Tanner or Uncle Joey can step in in time for dinner. Cut. It. Out.
Now is definitely not the time to be on Def Jam unless you want your project available to the world before it’s time. The Hologram’s album leaking two weeks before it drops is completely inexcusable. And then the Nas and Jay track leaks. That track wasn’t supposed to drop until early December, but I guess hip-hop suffered a surprise heart attack as the song dropped last Tuesday. Somebody, somewhere on the Def Jam chain of command isn’t doing what they need to be doing to protect what they need to protect.
Although Fat Joe’s Me, Myself and I was definitely not as highly anticipated as Kingdom Come, that album did not spread like wildfire all over the internet. Fat Joe is not Jay-Z, but he’s still a rap heavyweight (no pun intended) (well, maybe). Maybe Def Jam needs to take a cue from the smaller labels on how to not have their music leaking early like an unexpected period.
I spoke to Littles about leaks in general because he gives a great perspective as an independent artist and he’s done very well for himself selling his DVD’s and albums. Littles mentioned to me how he knows the people at the pressing plant he goes to so he’ll have a good idea if it leaks through them. He also knows who he gives early copies of his music to, meaning that if it got leaked he could find out who leaked it. Littles also said that when bootlegs are released without the right tracklisting, it was probably the label doing that to get the buzz up on an artist. Being that the Kingdom Come leak was the full album sans the bonus cuts, it’s safe to say that wasn’t a planned move by The Hologram and LA Reid. Littles also made the point that when you visit somebody in jail, the guards make sure you’re not bringing anything into the jail or leaving the jail with anything you’re not supposed to be leaving with. Maybe it’s time for pressing plants to step up their security.
And Littles did promise to help me paint my bike black with newspaper delivery intentions.
Looking at Kingdom Come, who should have a copy of that album besides Jay? Jay is the president there, so he really doesn’t have to have anyone A&R it. Young Guru should have all the songs on his computer since he probably engineered them and whoever does the mastering would have them, but that’s it. Nobody else, from Beyonce to Lenny S to LA Reid to Memphis Bleek to Jay’s publicist should have a copy of the album. Reviewers don’t even need a copy of the album because they’re going to review it anyway when it comes out, and Jay doesn’t even need reviews. When he’s on the cover of USA Today and Monday Night Football, he doesn’t really need to sweat an XXL or Elemental review.
No DJ Premier on Nas’ Hip-Hop is Dead. From now on, whenever anybody, including Freddie Foxxx, says they’re working with Primo, I’m going to assume it’s a lie. Sorry, Freddie, it’s not that I don’t trust you, it’s just that I, along with everyone else, have been lied to so many times that we can’t tell the truth from a lie the same way all A&R’s can’t tell tomato soup from chicken noodle soup. I’m considering starting a petition for all artists, no matter what level they’re on, to never say they’re working with DJ Premier or Dr. Dre until they have the mastered song in their hands and the right to use it on their album or mixtape or whatever. I just hope Nas doesn’t say what every other rapper says when they don’t end up with a Premier track: “Primo was busy.” We know Primo is busy, but if he finds time to work with AZ, Termanology and D-Block, don’t you think he could find the time to squeeze in a Nas session? I don’t want to read between the lines on this one, but something’s not right.
Jibbs is apparently working with the Cartoon Network now. Good to see rappers getting in where they fit in.
By now you’ve probably seen the video of Seinfeld’s Kramer’s disgusting racist tirade. He’s obviously working hard to clear up the incident and tell everybody he’s not a racist. Anytime you have to hold press conferences to say that you’re not a racist, you probably are. If you say something to the effect of “Fifty years ago, we’d have you upside down with a fucking fork up your ass. He’s a n-----,” no amount of apologizing or denying that you’re a racist will really help you there. Why is that word even in your vocabulary if you’re not a racist? Out of all the things he could have said to his hecklers, the best word he could use was the n-word? And as a now-famous teacher once pointed out (Column 41), what he was saying the n-word he was not being racist because he said the ending like “-gaaaaa” and not “gerrrrrr.” Kramer definitely used the “-gerrrrrr.” Definitely.
Kenny Kramer, whom Seinfeld’s Kramer was based off, said in the New York Post, “Michael is no racist. He just got frustrated with the situation and had a tantrum.” If this is the best Michael Richards can do now, wouldn’t you have loved to see him as a child? “Put the candy down, lil’ Michael.” The response = Cartman + David Duke.
Look, we all get frustrated with certain situations. Not everything can go right all the time. It’s just that most of us don’t think to/want to use those kinds of words to convey our frustration. Whatever happened to the standard insults like “asshole” or “poopbreath”?
It’s also great how the owner of the club, Jamie Masada, “apologized from his heart” for the incident and said that Kramer would not be allowed back until he apologized and then let him back anyway because he planned to apologize. Of course he’s planning on apologizing and of course he’s going to apologize. The apology is going to get all Seinfeld fans with blinders on to come back to watch his stand-up. I can’t say if he’s a funny stand-up or not since I haven’t seen him, but I’m guessing it’s not that funny. How funny can someone really be if they’re ten-seconds away from unleashing an n-bomb tirade on an unhappy fan? Regardless of how funny he is or isn’t, I think he gained a lot of racist fans with his “fork in the ass” comment and repeated n-bombs. You know your career is basically over when the only two types of fans you have left are racists and idiots.
Michael Richards is 57 years-old. That means he was sticking forks up people’s asses when he was 7 years-old. I really, really don’t want to know where he grew up at and how/why/when sticking forks up people’s asses became acceptable behavior.
This may not be the best time for Jerry Seinfeld to be sticking next to his idiot neighbor. When you tell someone you have their back, there should be an outclause somewhere in there that lets you out if said friend talks about sticking forks up people’s butts while repeatedly calling them the n-word. Michael Richards is disgusting for what he did.
Can someone slide Mel Gibson a Zima so we can hear what he thinks about all this?
Apparently Poison Pen’s not the only New Yorker who’s not a fan of Borat. Another friendly face in New York punched Borat in the face when Borat asked if he could have sex with the guys clothes. Memo to Borat: As funny as you think you are and as famous as you think you are, not everybody knows you and not everybody is going to laugh when you ask to have sex with their clothes. And memo to the angry New Yorker, who could be Poison Pen: The dude did not try to rob you and actually complimented you on your clothes first. There are a lot of good reasons to punch somebody, but I’m not sure if it’s really worth it to punch somebody for wanting to make love to your clothes. Next time just point Borat in the direction of the nearest Old Navy.
There was a long, long line of people camping out for a PS3 at the local Best Buy this past week. If you are able to take that kind of time off from work/school/porning to lay out on a concrete sidewalk with other like-minded people and discuss the finer points of Warcraft or Sim City or Oregon Trail or whatever game is popular these days, that makes you a loser. Even if you were camping out to just resell it on eBay and make $400 profit, you are still a loser. Shouldn’t you be out getting revenge on a sith or at your local mall hanging out in that novelty item store with all the lava lamps and Family Guy t-shirts? I can’t think of the name of the store, but you know what I’m talking about. Plus it’s late and I really don’t want to drive out to the mall just to get the name of the store.
I guess we’ll never get to hear Orange Juice’s Plan B.
In other news, in case you were upset at why Jin’s “I Download” was taken off the Audio Page, you can send a thank-you card to the RIAA. According to the RIAA, the song promotes piracy. Of course they missed the point of the song which was a humorous take on why albums aren’t selling anymore and how there is no motivation to buy music anymore, but, as the great Michael Scott would say, whatevs.
My sincere condolences go out to Rutgers fans and players for the abrupt ending to their perfect season. I’ve always cheered for Rutgers and I was very close to going there, so seeing them lose like that to Cincinnati of all teams definitely hurt almost as much as the car accident I was in when I was visiting the campus. I was stopped at a 4-way stop along one of the main stretches of campus. I got the green light so I go while a dumb broad in an SUV has a red. She stops. Then, while the light is still red, she guns it. Of course she was talking on her phone. I couldn’t accelerate fast enough so she goes right into my side. That was the first sign that I wasn’t meant to be a Scarlet Knight. The second sign was the cross country/track program. A few different people involved in Rutgers and distance running strongly advised me that wasn’t a program I should be in, and it was definitely the right decision.
I’m about to go in the lab with DJ Premier. He’s going to help me on my next column.
That was just to make sure you’re still paying attention.
And Tiki, if it’s not too much trouble, would you mind disseminating some offense and maybe disseminating some advice on passing to Eli Manning. The Disseminator has been very disappointing these past couple of weeks.
Since Thanksgiving is coming up, that gives us all enough time to prepare for all the Thanksgiving specials on other sites. Who do you think is rap’s biggest turkey? Is Gravy available for an interview? What rappers are Indians and what rappers are pilgrims? HipHopGame asks the tough questions.
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