Props to the
Steelers. I'm glad The Bus and Bill Cowher finally got their rings. The
best part about Sunday was definitely the game. The commercials seemed kind
of wack this year. And how about the halftime show. After that shit I'm more
scared of Mick Jagger than Joey Porter. Looking at Mick and Keith Richards should
be enough motivation for all these kids to just say no. And props to the NFL
for booking the Rolling Stones for the Super Bowl Halftime Show in Detroit.
I guess all the classic Motown artists were booked.
If you haven't
read the Remy Ma interview, I suggest you go and read that now. That
is by far one of the more entertaining interviews I've done in awhile. Her publicist
called me before the interview went down and said that a lot of writers were
complaining that they weren't getting good interviews. That's how it is sometimes,
especially on a press day when they might be doing 10 interviews. Plus most
interviewers have some dumb-ass questions too. How did it feel to get shot?
It hurt motherfucker. Freaking lames. Remy was heated when we were connected.
I knew from her yelling in the background that asking her questions like "what's
it like to be in Terror Squad" would have to be thrown gently out the window.
It was definitely a challenging interview at first, but it is a dope, dope interview
because she gave very honest and candid answers.
How's this for
some news. A 13 year-old girl was walking her chihuahua when it pooped on the
sidewalk. The man who lived in the house ran out, picked up the dog poop, and
chased the girl, holding the dog poop, and then smeared it on her clothes and
hair. First off, who picks up dog shit, and then who thinks that the best thing
to do with it is to smear it on a 13 year-old girl? Was he out of those plastic
bags people use to pick up their dog's poop and did he not feel like going to
the backyard to grab the shovel? "Hmm, I'm out of plastic bags and it's
too cold to look for the shovel, I know, I'll put the feces in my hand and dispose
of it on that little girl's back. That'll show her." The dude was 6'2",
and the girl is 13 years-old. Imagine how terrifying it would be to see a big
old man running after you with poop in his hand. Shit, I'd be scared if someone
was chasing me holding poop. Later on, the cops told the poop-smearer Krupnik
that the girl was 13 years-old. His response to that was "I thought she
was older." Look Krupnik, there is no age that girls reach that make it
ok for you to smear feces on them. The last time I checked, there was never
a socially-agreed upon age when it became ok to smear poop on people. Krupnik
also has three children. I bet those three are always on their best behavior.
"Joey, don't color on the rug, Daddy just ate corn. You don't want that
on your face do you?"
Thank God that
the "first quarter" is almost done. Now everyone can stop trying
to sound like businessmen. I hate hearing how everyone has "big plans for
the first quarter." That's the only time punk motherfuckers talk like that.
Come June, no one is saying, "I'm looking for this third quarter to be
big." I don't know if cats read about industry slang in a book or whatever,
but trying to sound professional with the term "first quarter" does
not work because you're usually out of the game by the time the second quarter
is starting.
How come everyone
is surprised at Mase talking about guns? The man signed to Puff and then decided
to get into organized religion. C'mon, put two and two together. That whole
positive rap thing obviously wasn't filling his pockets and neither was the
collection plate, so now it's gggggg unit.
And speaking of
the unit of g's, how about 50's diss to Game. I'm tired of their
beef, but wasn't that shit hilarious. The hook was straight comedy. Game may
come more intense with all of his bars, but 50 made a simple song and made most
people laugh.
I think it's time
for Jay to answer Cam. Rap is mad boring right now. Maybe Jay
just doesn't have it anymore...
Don't you love
how James Frey is getting sued over publishing a memoir where he made
up parts of it? If the lady suing him wins that lawsuit, I think it's safe to
say that every Hip Hop artist should be expecting a lawsuit. Remember how Saigon
said we needed a new name for Hip Hop? I don't think we need a new name. I think
we just need to classify albums in terms of fiction or non-fiction. That way
everyone will know it's fake shit and will have no excuse to get mad when they
realize that rappers don't clap at people like a round of applause or move more
bricks than the three little pigs. I propose a lifetime ban from Hip Hop if
anyone uses those two lines, or ever tries to make a sports analogy like "I'm
a Raider like Oakland." If I had a buzzer it would be sounding right now.
I was at a college
basketball game recently and saw one of the most disturbing halftime shows ever.
It was a dude with a jumprope. At least the Giants usually bring out some fat
guy to try and field punts. That's sort of entertaining I guess. To see an old
man skip rope is not what's up. What's next at halftime shows? Four square?
Hopscotch? I mean, this guy came out amped and ready to go too. I haven't seen
girls jump rope that well since third grade. If you are not Rocky or Mike Tyson,
and you're past the age of 8, please don't jump rope. Halftime shows are usually
never good, and grown men skipping rope only makes it worse.
What's JR Writer
going to do to keep up with JR Rider? The former Timberwolf and Trailblazer
was caught in a kidnapping scheme. JR Writer's going to have to step his game
up if he expects to compete with Isiah Rider.
Big shout out to
Fat Beats for putting the annoying-ass promo tags all over El da Sensei's
album. I could hear most of it, and it's definitely dope. It's easy to see how
El and Tame could never do music together. Tame is rhyming about dust and El
is tearing it up on some good ol' Hip Hop vibes...definitely check for El's
album on the 28th.
That's about it
for now. Please don't smear poop on any young girls.
05/13 - 
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